Mentoring is a collaborative relationship, rooted with principles and practices of adult learning. A mentor and mentee work together to define and achieve mutually defined goals that focus on the mentee’s growth and development in skills, abilities, knowledge and/or thinking. It is in every way a reciprocal learning partnership. Being in such a relationship can be daunting for a mentee, especially so for first-time mentees who often lack the confidence and competence needed to feel comfortable in a mentoring relationship. Many mentees feel that they don’t bring anything to the relationship and come to the relationship waiting for a mentor “to take them under their wing.” Even though power in the relationship is supposed to shared, it is a still and formidable presence. Frequently mentees are afraid to assert themselves and ask for what they need for fear of offending their mentor and not being respectful of their status. Read the rest of Mentoring: Leveling the Playing Field »
“There is nothing quite as important as having well-defined learning goals in a mentoring relationship. A clear, compelling goal inspires action and is indispensable to the work of mentoring in enabling growth and evaluating the ongoing success of the relationship.”
(The Mentor’s Guide, 2012) Read the rest of Goal Setting: Getting on the Path to Growth and Development »
The expression, “what gets measured gets done,” has become a favorite, if not familiar refrain, when it comes to measuring results. Measurement keeps a mentoring program focused and on track. It provides direction and parameters, and targets areas for process improvement. It adds value and credibility to a program and is a factor in achieving its long term sustainability.
And yet, when it comes to mentoring program results, measurement frequently gets put on the back burner. How is that possible? Why is it that mentoring measurement is so easily dismissed? Read the rest of Are you measuring up or simply not measuring? »
Uncategorized by .
Mentoring is enjoying unprecedented popularity. It has shifted from a “would be nice” to have soft-skill to a “must-have” talent development tool. Along with its increased popularity, a shift in how it is practiced has also occurred. Read the rest of Don’t Settle for Low Hanging Fruit! »
Uncategorized by .
One of the most important benefits of a mentoring partnership is the candid feedback that occurs when both parties engage in it with each other.
Getting honest feedback from peers and supervisors in a work environment is challenging. The pervasive concerns are always about how it will be taken, fear of damaging the relationship, and the potential for resistance. If one or more parties tend to be conflict averse, it makes it even less likely that they will engage in candid feedback. In mentoring, just the opposite occurs. Mentees look to their mentors as a trusted source of candid feedback.
Mentees appreciate receiving feedback because they know it is given in good faith, with the intention of improving their performance and supporting their long-term development and career success. Mentors and mentees who commit to building their own competency and confidence in the feedback process report more positive outcomes than those who do not.
When Joe was assigned Henri as a mentor, he expected to get feedback about how he was doing and how upper management perceived him. Despite asking Henri several times about how thought things were going and what he was hearing, all Joe ever heard is, “everything’s fine.” Joe found it hard to believe that there wasn’t something to work on and began to suspect that there really was an underlying problem. Because Henri wasn’t offering specifics, Joe started second-guessing everything he was hearing from Henri. He began to dread mentoring meetings and rarely invested energy in their conversations.
What went wrong?
Clearly, absence of candid conversation and a clear feedback process undermined the trust in this mentoring partnership.
What can you do?
1. Start your relationship with the expectation that feedback will be part of the process.
2. Create ground rules and agreements about when, how often, and what process is best suited to your relationship.
3. Tell the truth; develop a habit of straight talk and don’t let either side stray.
4. Balance candor with compassion, but tell it like you see it.
5. Encourage your mentee to be candid. It is hard for mentees, especially new hires and those in the lower tiers of the organization, to speak up.
6. Be positive. Offer positive feedback along with constructive comments.
7. Show appreciation even when you receive negative feedback. Remember: it requires courage to offer negative feedback.
8. Practice difficult conversations.
9. Master behaviors and processes that can help you become more effective at constructive feedback.
10. Focus on what can be changed.
Uncategorized by .
From Our Mentoring Mailbag…. Read the rest of Identifying The Hat You Are Wearing When Giving Feedback »
Uncategorized by .
Each mentoring relationship is just as unique as the individuals in it and needs to work for both mentoring partners. Read the rest of How structured should a mentoring relationship be? »
Uncategorized by .
Let’s take a page from Gray’s anatomy to look at the some of the roles today’s smart savvy mentor’s play: Read the rest of Mentoring from Head to Toe »
Uncategorized by .
Are you looking at mentoring someone right now?
Have you mentored someone in the past or considering mentoring someone in the future? Read the rest of Preparation is Key to Success »
Uncategorized by .
I have just read Adam Bryant’s interview with Kathy Button Bell for the third time and it should be required reading for new and experienced mentors. Sure, it may be entitled, “Endurance on the Field and at Work,” but it could just have easily been called “All About Mentoring.” It is a testimony to the power of mentoring, the centrality of learning in a mentoring relationship for both the mentor and mentee. Read the rest of Mentoring Extraordinaire »
Uncategorized by .